My ‘Backstory’
So, a little bit about me.
My name is Steve. I was engaged at 16, married at 18 and my wife and I have four grown up children. Between them they have given us, 26 wonderful Grandchildren. (My wife is one of seven children and I think it rubbed-off on our kids🙂 )
In the beginning
My story begins 3 weeks before my 17th Birthday. I’d started my ‘motor vehicle technician’ apprenticeship 6 months earlier and I’d arranged my first driving lesson. Life was good!
Then, for no apparent reason, one morning after breakfast I suffered a seizure. For the next eleven years, the diagnosis of epilepsy destroyed what little self-confidence I had left.
Then, at 28, a brain tumour was discovered.
Long story short (yes, honestly 🙂 ), before the operation, my surgeon told me that it was almost certainly malignant, but only a biopsy would tell for sure. I was a vegetable for four days after the operation, then I was told that the tumour wasn’t Cancer. Three days later I was at home with my family, completely back to normal.
It was then I realized how powerful the mind was. (After all, I went from not recognizing my family and being unable to feed myself, or even use the toilet one day, to eating, drinking, reading and watching TV the next!)
While I was recovering at home, all I could think about was how different things could’ve been, if the diagnosis had been different. I was also fascinated at how one thought could make such dramatic changes in me.
I needed to use this opportunity. So, I decided to learn as much as I could about how the mind worked. And then, how I could help people create better lives for themselves, using what I’d learned.
Over the course of the following years, I formally studied Clinical Hypnotherapy, Psychotherapy, Mindfulness, Meditation and Psychology, gaining my Ph.D in 2006.
I’m also a qualified Cognitive Behavioural Therapist and I’ve completed professional development courses in both Advanced Child Psychology and Clinical Psychology. I’ve also, read well over 500 personal development books.
Confronting the real problem
But, right there was my problem. I spent a truck load of money and countless hours getting every piece of information and training I could. Then, because I didn’t feel confident enough to use it, I just moved on and learned something else. Telling myself “This time it’ll be different”. Except it wasn’t!
I got back into the same hamster wheel again and again. Every time getting the same results. Lots of knowledge, but no experience!
I think it was Einstein that was attributed to the saying…“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” That was me for more years than I care to remember.
Then, one day, I was speaking to my Mom and I told her about this new learning experience I’d enrolled in. But, rather than be pleased for me, or tell me how clever I was (I thought that was a Mom’s job?), she asked me a question that would change my life completely…
So, what was this life changing question?……..
“That’s great, but are you actually going to do something with it this time, or is this just another way to throw away your money?”
Wow! Talk about harsh! But she was right. For some reason, my head was full of all this powerful information that could help people, but it never occurred to me to use these powerful tools on myself. My thoughts were always “If I just just get a bit more knowledge about ‘X’, then I’ll start helping other people.”
Since that day…
That was in 2003. The truth was, I needed to help myself first. So, I was my first client.
In the space of a few months I managed to make some huge changes to my life. I went from struggling to ask a stranger for the time, to being well-on-the-way to where I am now.
I’ve given presentations and provided live training events to rooms full of people, I was a lecturer at a college and also spent four years training CEO’s, and Managing Directors, etc of multi-national companies.
After mastering my self-confidence, I was able to actually start living.
Self-confidence Coaching can incorporate the teachings from each of these disciplines. Everyone learns to take control of their life in a different way. So, everyone needs a slightly different approach to get where they need to be.
But, one thing is super clear. If you want to make a change in your life that sticks, the process you need has to have three characteristics…
- You need to know why you want it
- Each step has to be simple to understand and actionable.
- You need to be able to take action on it quickly and consistently.
Together, we can make big changes.
I still occasionally have times when anxiety and stress, etc. plays a part in my own life and I’m sure it always will. But, by following a path that’s powerful, simple to understand and implement and most importantly, right for you, you’ll gain more confidence and therefore more happiness and fulfillment than you ever thought possible.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this page. I hope you’ll let me go on this journey of discovery with you. I promise to be your biggest fan and I’ll help in any way I can 🙂
Steve